Eavesdropping: Listen in to Improve Your Screenplay Dialogue

rowan

5 months ago

Eavesdropping 101: Listen in Cafés to Improve Your Screenplay Dialogue

Too often we’re told to “write realistic dialogue.”

That’s no excuse to transcribe everyday speech verbatim. If you did that, it would sound like shit.

Real conversation is rambling, fragmented, repetitive, and often painfully dull. Screenplay dialogue, on the other hand, is compressed and alive with subtext, yet it feels real.

The trick, then is to write dialogue that sounds natural without copying real people word-for-word.

The way to do this is to understand everyday speech—its rhythms, patterns, tics, and awkward silences—and bring the point across without simple mimicry. One of the best ways to do this is to spend time observing people in their native conversational habitats: cafés, bars, park benches, waiting rooms, Ubers—wherever humans talk without thinking about being heard.

This blog post is your guide to becoming a dialogue detective. You’ll learn:

Why public spaces are your dialogue laboratory
How to listen like a writer (not a stalker)
The difference between real speech and screen dialogue
What specific “tics” to watch for
How to distill real-life mess into screen-ready music
And why sometimes the most revealing line is the one that goes unspoken

Let’s grab a coffee, find a corner seat, and tune in.

Part I: Why Cafés and Bars Are Goldmines for Dialogue

Bars and cafés offer the perfect mix of privacy and public life. People feel just safe enough to speak freely, but open enough that you can listen without being intrusive.

What makes them ideal:

People are off-guard: you’ll hear caffeine-fueled rants, breakups over IPAs, awkward job interviews, and more
Conversations range from intimate to banal, giving you a wide spectrum to work with
You get real emotional stakes: a first date, a fight, an apology, a confession

These situations are raw, messy, alive.

And they give you something that even the best screenwriting books can’t: that is, a feel for how people actually talk when they’re not performing.

Part II: How to Listen Like a Screenwriter

Bring a notebook. Or your phone. Or just your brain.

Obviously you’ll look mega-creepy if you have your Voice Notes running on the table in front of you or you stare as you write down everything word-for-word. You’re not a court stenographer (plus they know shorthand!).

Take key notes; write down interesting phrases or snippets you hear. You’re not surveilling like the Stasi (or a tech company). You’re conducting a form of creative anthropology.

Here’s a good sample workflow:

Pick a table near—but not too near—people talking. Not that you necessarily have a choice, but if it’s possible, try to steer clear of ridiculously personal conversations: child custody disputes, emotional abuse, polycule negotiations, etc. Start with easy ones.
Listen for structure, not content. It’s not about the specific things being said; rather, listen for how people talk: the pauses, interruptions, verbal tics, shifts in energy.
Write a few lines of what you hear—try to catch the rhythm and tone, even if the words aren’t verbatim. Capture fragments.
Consider going on emotionally beneath the words. Is someone boasting to impress? Is that lady trying to be polite but looking for any excuse to leave?
Later, rewrite the moment as a scene. Clean it up, making the dialogue short, sharp, and direct. Keep the soul of the situation but lose the mess of real speech.

The goal here is to learn the DNA of conversation structure so you can manipulate it at will, just like a musician riffing off a melody.

Part III: Normal Speech vs. Screenplay Dialogue: What’s the Difference?

This is where new screenwriters stumble. Real speech is not cinematic. It’s:

Repetitive
Full of filler (“um,” “you know,” “like”)
Directionless
Interrupt-heavy
Packed with tangents
Often avoids conflict

Screenplay dialogue is:

Compressed
Intentional
Rhythmically sharp
Conflict-driven
Full of subtext

But good dialogue feels like real speech—without being real speech.

As an example:

REAL SPEECH:
“I mean, yeah, I guess I could maybe come, but like—I don’t know, I’ve got that thing on Thursday, right? Unless it was canceled or something. Is it Thursday or Friday?”

SCREENPLAY VERSION:
“I can’t. I’ve got something Thursday. Or Friday. I forget.”

The second version is tighter. It’s the same idea of hesitation and uncertainty, but note how it doesn’t waste screen time.

In fact, a reasonable rule when writing dialogue is to keep 95% of your dialogue lines under three lines of text.

Part IV: Tics to Notice in Real Speech (and How to Use or Trim Them)

Listening in cafés helps you spot dialogue tics—patterns of speech that real people use without realizing.

Common Tics:

Tic Type	Real-Life Example	Screen Use
Filler Words	“like,” “um,” “you know”	Use sparingly for rhythm or character (teens, anxious people)
Over-Explanation	“What I’m trying to say is…”	Cut or condense to a single clear line
Circling Back	“Wait, what was I saying?”	Occasionally useful for comic timing, but that would be the only reason
Echoes	“Right? Right?”	Maybe if someone seeks affirmation, but usually cut
Apology Speech	“I don’t mean to be rude, but…”	Cut bullshit setups like this; go straight to the punchline
Intonation over Meaning	“Seriously?” “Are you kidding me?”	Use these for emotional beats—not to convey information

The goal is to replicate the texture of real talk without the fat. Essence, not clutter.

Part V: Emotions Beneath the Words

People rarely say exactly what they mean; this is the battle between surface and subtext.

Try this:

Especially in bars, see if you can identify a first date. How many compliments are really insecurity?
Observe an argument. When does tone change? Who withdraws first?
Listen to coworkers. Who dominates? Who defers?

Translate these into scenes:

A character says “I’m fine” while avoiding eye contact
A man says, “This is fun,” while checking his watch
A woman says, “You always do this,” but she’s really asking, “Will you ever change?”

Dialogue is camouflage, tension, and subtext. See what people are doing beyond the words (even if the actual way they’re saying it is messy).

Part VI: Transcription Practice: A Mini-Exercise

Try this exercise after a café or bar session.

1. Write 4-6 lines of raw conversation you overheard:

A: “So, yeah, I was like, ‘Sure, totally!’ but inside I’m screaming, you know?”
B: “You always say yes. That’s your thing.”
A: “Not always.”
B: “Name one time you said no.”
A: “I—okay, shut up.”

2. Now write a cleaned-up screen version:

I said yes. Out loud. In my head, I was screaming.

You always say yes.

Not always.

Name one time.

…Shut up.

This version preserves rhythm and tone, but by trimming the fat the emotional clarity comes through more clearly.

Part VII: Bar Talk vs. Café Talk: Know Your Setting

Each space produces different types of speech.

In Cafés:

People are more cerebral, restrained, polite
You’ll hear interviews, study sessions, romantic hesitations
Great for capturing subtle shifts in tone, politeness masking discomfort

In Bars:

People are louder, messier, more direct
You’ll hear confessions, arguments, bravado, flirtation (bonus points if you find a job interview in a bar)
Great for studying emotional escalation and truth under pressure

Side Note: Watch Bartenders

Bartenders hear the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Watch how the bartender listens, responds, deflects, or engages. In places where people actually sit at the bar (unlike a lot of busy pubs), watch how the bartenders handle regulars or defuse tension if a problem arises.

Part VIII: Seeds from Real Life

The goal here can easily be more than simply dialogue—try to gather scene starters. Here are examples of overheard lines that could launch entire scenes:

“What’s the point in ghosting me? You know I’ll see you at work tomorrow!”
“That is definitely not her dog. I know her dog.”
“She said doesn’t believe in dentists.”
“I’ve got the decorum of a dumptruck in reverse with no tires.”
“…and then everyone will be like ‘why does it smell like sex in here?’”

These lines are real, overheard, and inherently dramatic. Use them as jumping-off points for scenes, characters, or entire subplots.

Part IX: The Unspoken Line

Sometimes the best part of a conversation is what’s not said.

As you listen in public, watch for body language, silences, micro-reactions:

A long pause before answering
Eyes darting away
One person dominating the airspace (notice how it’s almost always an American?)
A half-finished sentence cut short by emotion

Such unwritten lines say more than words ever could. Good dialogue leaves space for performance—but real life shows you just how those gaps work.

*Says the American person. But it is true!

Let the World Be Your Dialogue Coach

Every café, bar, bookstore, or subway car is full of unscripted dialogue.

Your job as a screenwriter isn’t to transcribe this dialogue militantly, but to understand it.

Learn its rhythms, absorb its subtext, and then sculpt it into something sharper and cleaner. Getting the point across but in its own poetic way.

So close Final Draft (or Scrivener) for an hour. Go outside. Find a noisy café or bar. Get a drink and a notebook. Listen: not just for words, but for tension. For rhythm. For truth beneath the noise.